On the Wednesday episode of Facebook Watch’s Red Table Talk, co-host Willow Smith opened up about being polyamorous — and shared some insight into what polyamory means to her. “With polyamory, I feel like the main foundation is the freedom to be able to create a relationship style that works for you and not just stepping into monogamy because that’s what everyone around you says is the right thing to do,” Smith said. “So I was like, how can I structure the way that I approach relationships with that in mind?”
This is Red Table Talk, so naturally, her comment led to a frank, open discussion about sex, monogamy, and polyamory. “When you were like, ‘Hey, this is my get-down,’ I was like, ‘I totally get it.’ Wanting to set up your life in a way that you can have what it is that you want,” said her mom and co-host Jada Pinkett Smith. “I think anything goes as long as the intentions are clear.”
Smith’s grandma, Adrienne “Gammy” Banfield-Norris, was less on board at first; she said polyamory seemed solely “centred around sex.” Smith was excited to dispel that misconception, though. “In my friend group, I’m the only polyamorous person, and I have the least sex out of all of my friends,” she said. She gave the example of a person who might not want sex as often as their partner. Polyamory might be a good option for that couple, she explained.
Polyamory is personal and individual definitions may vary, but broadly speaking, being polyamorous means loving more than one person. Couples in polyamorous relationships might have other partners outside of their main relationships, while others may have multiple partners at a time. For some poly people, “being polyamorous feels hard-wired to their love lives,” sexuality educator Aida Manduley, LCSW, previously told Refinery29.
Smith is the latest public figure to speak out about being polyamorous. In March, Caroline Giuliani, Rudy Giuliani’s daughter, penned a Vanity Fair essay about her journey to non-monogamy. Bella Thorne and Younger star Nico Tortorella have also discussed how and why polyamory works for them.
Smith has previously mentioned that she was open to polyamory while discussing her sexuality in a 2019 episode of Red Table Talk. She said that she could see herself fulfilled with just two partners, though. “I love men and women equally, and so I would definitely want one man, one woman,” she said at the time. “I focus a lot on the emotional connection, and I feel like if I were to find two people of different genders that I really connected with and we had a romantic and sexual connection, I don’t feel like I would feel the need to try to go find more.”
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
How Polyamorous People Are Surviving The Pandemic