This week: “I’m a 28-year-old brand manager living near Manchester and I’m currently on maternity leave. I live with my husband (A) and newborn baby (B). A commuted into Manchester for work until the start of the pandemic but he’s been working from home pretty much 100% of the time since. We have both our salaries paid into our joint account and all bills come from there. We use this money for anything to do with the house, car, going out for meals or days out, presents for family etc. and now, of course, anything to do with B. Each month we both take £300 to move into our own account to spend on what we want (going out with friends, haircuts, phone bills). I like to have a set amount that we save into our joint savings (£500 a month when not on maternity) and I like to save £100 from my spends into my personal savings account. A is much more of a spender when it comes to his personal money so he doesn’t really have any separate savings at all.”
Occupation: Brand manager
Industry: Retail
Age: 28
Location: Manchester
Salary: £35,000
Paycheque amount: £2,089 (when not on maternity leave).
Number of housemates: Two: my husband (A) and baby (B).
Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses
Housing costs: £989 until May when our remortgage begins, then it will go down to £822 a month.
Loan payments: £239 a month for PCP on my car (£15,500 owed). We both have a student loan that comes out of our pay pre-tax.
Savings: £6,500 in joint savings (earmarked to cover my maternity leave), £2,500 in my personal savings, £530 in my own S&S ISA (again saved from my personal spends).
Pension: At the moment both my employer and I pay the minimum % into my workplace pension.
Utilities: Council tax £213, internet £33, water £20, gas and electric £86, car insurance £36, home insurance £13, TV licence £13.
All other monthly expenses: giffgaff SIM only £10, life insurance, critical illness insurance and income protection for two £153, sofa repayment £48. Subscriptions: Netflix £10.
Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
I did a degree in marketing at university and took a student loan out to pay for it. My mum and dad were quite concerned about me going to university as no one else in my family had been. They didn’t understand how student loans work and were worried about me saddling myself with debt. They were proud of me for going and graduating but they definitely would have been just as proud if I had gone straight to work from school or college or done an apprenticeship.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money?
None really. I was aware that we had enough to cover our needs and some of our wants but we never used to get takeaways or eat out unless it was a birthday and then I just remember going to pubs and eating off the ‘2 for £10’ menu. As we got older their financial situation improved and we went from having the odd beach holiday to going on a beach holiday and a European city break every year by the time I was mid teens. But they were clear that they couldn’t support me through uni outside of sending me £20 a week for food (which I was 100% okay with).
What was your first job and why did you get it?
Working on the till at WHSmith. My parents were clear that as soon as my NI number came through the post I was expected to get a weekend job to learn the value of money and to build up some kind of experience for my CV. I used the money for clothes and driving lessons.
Did you worry about money growing up?
No but I did go to high school in an affluent area and was aware that my friends’ parents were all very well off. They all had large detached houses, multiple cars and my friends all got pocket money at the drop of a hat and were given cars for their 17th birthdays. I was probably a bit of a brat to my parents about this at the time but I like to think I wasn’t too bad and I can see looking back that my friends’ situations weren’t the norm at all.
Do you worry about money now?
I didn’t until we started saving for my maternity leave as my employer only offers statutory maternity pay, which is six weeks at 90% pay, 39 weeks at £151 a week and then 12 weeks at £0. This is quite the drop in household income for us so we saved as much as we could (£6,500) during my pregnancy.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
Twenty-two. After uni I lived with my parents for a year and then A and I bought our first house. Living at home for only £100 a month board while working in my first postgrad job allowed me to save £8k, which was my half of the deposit on our house.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income?
Yes. When I was 16 my grandparents gave me an ISA with £1,200 in it. I didn’t touch it until I was 19 and then I used it to buy my first car. Then when I was 21 my grandad found out he was terminally ill and so my grandparents gave all their grandchildren £5,000.
8.30am: After getting up with our newborn, B, at midnight, 3am and 6.15am, A gets up for work (he works from home, thank god). As he doesn’t have any meetings ’til 10.30am he takes B into his office while I get some more sleep. A had two weeks off when B was born and this has been his first week back at work but after today he has another week off, which I’m really looking forward to.
11am: After getting up, having some cereal and setting up Modern Family on TV, an Amazon package arrives of some more muslin cloths. We’ve already found that you can never have too many!
12pm: We go out for a walk for A’s lunch hour but after nearly an hour’s slow loop I’m absolutely knackered. I don’t think I’m up to walking so far yet, it was only three weeks ago that I gave birth.
1pm: We get home. I feed B and change her nappy, which she absolutely hates. She screams through the entire thing, which is really hard to hear and makes me cry too. A even comes down from his office to check we’re okay as she’s screaming so loudly. He tries to settle her, which doesn’t work, and in the end I sit with her on my chest while she eventually sleeps and I watch TV.
5pm: A finishes work for the day and heads to bed to catch up on sleep.
7pm: A comes downstairs and makes enchiladas for us for tea.
8.30pm: I decide to drive to the nearby Tim Hortons for doughnuts and a milkshake. I get us two strawberry cheesecake doughnuts and one strawberry shake, £9.97. When I get back we eat while watching The King’s Man. I’d give the doughnut a 9/10 and the shake a 6/10 (I thought it would be like a McDonald’s milkshake but it’s more like a fruit cooler consistency with strawberry syrup).
11pm: The film was maybe a 6.5/10. I really enjoyed the first Kingsman film but this one had some really weird parts to the storyline. After pausing the film about 7,000 times to see to B, we head up to bed.
Total: £9.97
6.45am: After being up with B twice before now, A goes and makes another bottle for her (we have a nighttime system where A makes every bottle throughout the night, then if he’s working he passes the bottle to me to feed B while he goes back to sleep. If it’s a Friday or Saturday night then he shares the feeds too). Halfway through feeding B I realise that she has not in fact guzzled 2oz but the bottle has leaked all over her as A didn’t screw the lid on properly. We change her nappy and vest/baby grow while I seethe on the inside as I’m so tired.
10.15am: I wake up to find that A got up and took B into his office with him at 8.30am. It’s the weekend so he isn’t working but he’s put her in the second Moses basket while he plays a game. I get ready as A’s parents and sister are coming round to see us at lunchtime.
3pm: My in-laws leave and I potter round the house doing some cleaning/tidying. A heads up to bed for a snooze and I start watching Sweet Magnolias on Netflix and text my best friend, who moved a few hours away last year.
5pm: We head to our friends’ house for them to witness our mortgage deed as we are in the process of remortgaging. We bought our house in March 2020 for £293k and fixed for two years at a rate of 2.12%. Our house has gone up in value to £350k which gives us an LTV of around 70% so we’ve managed to get a great rate of 1.55% fixed for two years.
6pm: While we’re at our friends’ house they give us a present for the birth of B, which is a whole load of useful things like Calpol, teething gels, Infacol and some reusable wipes that they didn’t really use with their kids. This is great as they’re so much more sustainable than normal wipes and I’ve been feeling quite guilty at the amount of packaging and waste from all the baby items we’ve been buying/have been given.
6.30pm: We leave our friends and go to see my parents, who live on the opposite side of town to us, and have some duck spring rolls and teriyaki chicken bites. A also has some stir-fried noodles but I’m not keen on them so give them a miss.
10.15pm: We head home and go straight up to bed. As soon as we get upstairs B wakes up and doesn’t settle until nearly 1am.
Total: £0
10am: Another day where we sleep in late after waking up four times during the night.
1pm: We go to Aldi to do our food shopping. It somehow takes us forever to leave the house. We get most of a full food shop including fruit, veg, steak, chicken en croute, cheese tortellini, milk, cheese, soup, lemonade, washing up liquid, shampoo, cotton pads, nappies, frozen pizza, bread, part-baked bread rolls and a little baby care set that includes a thermometer, emery boards, hair brush, nose sucker thingy and a bunch of other things. £56
2pm: We then head to Sainsbury’s to pick up some other bits including ham, stir fry oil, crisps and a few beers. I get tempted by the bakery section and get two fancy brownies, £13.50. We also buy formula but pay for this from a savings pot that my colleagues collected for me ahead of maternity leave.
3.30pm: A takes B into his office to play his game while I go in the bath. I hear him talking to her through the wall while I’m in the bath and it melts my heart.
5pm: I get out the bath and it turns out that B didn’t sleep at all while she was with A. She wasn’t crying but A said he felt bad leaving her in the Moses basket staring at the ceiling so he had her in his arms the whole time instead of playing on his game. I say he should stay on his game a bit longer and I head downstairs with B. I pop her in the Moses basket and she’s asleep within 10 minutes!
7pm: A comes downstairs and makes dinner. We eat and then watch Power Book IV: Force (it’s the spinoff of Power that’s about Tommy, if anyone watched it).
9pm: I’m nodding off so we head up to bed early.
Total: £69.50
12.15am: B wakes up and doesn’t settle until 2am. She doesn’t really cry or scream but needs feeding, changing, rocking etc. until she goes off to sleep and we’re both exhausted by the time she drops off.
7.15am: B wakes up and I look at the time and wonder how she could have slept for over five hours. I worry that something is wrong with her and ask A if he got up with her in the night. Turns out she woke up at 4am and I didn’t even wake up. I feel like a terrible mum while A assures me that the only reason I didn’t wake up is because he happened to be pretty much awake when she started stirring so she never got to the point of crying to wake me. I still feel terrible and sit silently crying while I feed her.
12.15pm: We both kept dropping off to sleep after each time B woke up so we’re feeling quite refreshed! It does mean though that we only have an hour to get ready as we have a table booked for lunch at 2pm and the restaurant is about 30-40 minutes away.
2pm: We managed to get parking straightaway so are on time for our reservation. We share a Tomahawk steak and chips and I have my first cocktail since before I got pregnant. We also have a dessert each. Total including 15% service charge is £130.
4.30pm: We head home and get stuck in traffic on the way. We stop at Sainsbury’s on the way home as I forgot to pick up butter and some batteries for the baby’s bouncer the other day. £7.50
6pm: We all have a nap in the living room, with B in her Moses basket and A and I on a sofa each.
7.30pm: We wake up and I do a quick bit of tidying up. We watch an episode of Suspicion and then have some cheese on toast as we’re a bit peckish by this point.
10pm: Sleep.
Total: £137.50
9am: After four wake-ups in the night, B wakes up for a feed again and I realise her nappy has leaked everywhere. It’s a bit chilly in our room so stripping her off and changing her nappy results in a lot of screaming.
11am: After some faffing around I head downstairs and make us each a cup of tea and we decide to have pancakes for breakfast. A makes them and I have mine with chocolate spread and strawberries.
12.30pm: We leave the house and stop at the post office to post some paperwork for our remortgaging, then head to the hospital as B has an appointment for her tongue tie. I’m dreading it. We go in for the appointment, they confirm she has a tongue tie and they recommend snipping it. Luckily it only takes 30 seconds and it’s done. B doesn’t even notice.
1pm: On the way out of the hospital we stop at Marks and Spencer for a meal deal for lunch. I get a chicken salad sandwich, Quavers and a Coke Zero and A gets a Wispa, Monster Munch and a Dr Pepper. £8.05
1.15pm: We eat our lunch in the car after paying for parking, £2.50. We then drive to our friends’ house as they’ve just moved into their first home. We take a bottle of prosecco that we already had as a moving-in gift.
6pm: After catching up with our friends and having a tour of their new house we head home. It was also the first time they’d met B and they gave us a new baby gift.
6.30pm: We get home, get the clothes out of the washer that we put on before we left the house and put them on the radiators. A orders a greasy pizza from a nearby takeaway for £16 but I don’t fancy it. I’ll make something in a bit.
7pm: We’re going out for breakfast tomorrow as A has a dentist appointment in the village we grew up in. My nana still lives there so I ask her to join us. We arrange to meet at the cafe at 11am. I’m really close to my nana and she sounds excited to see us. After I get off the phone I make myself a carbonara for tea. While I’m cooking I start listening to a new audiobook (Wilde About The Girl by Louise Pentland).
8.30pm: A asks if I want to go in the bath while he stays downstairs with B. I jump at the chance and have a nice soak while I read.
10pm: I get out the bath and we watch some TV together then head up to bed.
Total: £26.55
8am: Only two wake-ups last night! I get up and take B downstairs while A plays on his game for an hour before we need to leave the house.
11am: I meet my nana at the cafe with B while A goes to his dentist appointment. My nana and I catch up over a cup of tea then A joins us after his appointment and we all order a full English breakfast. A and my nana share a pot of tea and I get an oat milk latte. We pay for breakfast for all three of us, and also pick up a slice of cake each on the way out for later. £45
1.30pm: A has another appointment, this time for an eye test, so we leave my nana and head back to the town centre. We park up and I go to Costa to wait while A goes into Vision Express. B is asleep in her pram and I sit and have a vanilla latte, £3.60. I forgot to bring my book with me so I just scroll on my phone, which is quite hard going as there’s barely any signal.
3pm: Home and we’re all pretty tired. I eat my slice of cake with a cup of tea, then have a bowl of strawberries and raspberries. B is asleep, A brings a duvet downstairs and has a nap on the sofa and I sit on the other sofa with a blanket to finish my tea and read my book.
7pm: After an afternoon of chores I make some tortellini in tomato and mascarpone sauce for tea. I message a couple of friends and make plans to go out for lunch this weekend and one day next week.
8pm: We sit down to watch the latest episode of Lego Masters Australia and I finally get round to ordering my nephew’s birthday gift, £10. I also order a dozen vegan Krispy Kreme doughnuts to be delivered to my sister for her birthday, which is next week. £19.40
9pm: I get a notification on my phone for about the 10th time in the past month saying that my SD card isn’t working. I’m terrified I’ll lose all the photos I’ve taken of B so I subscribe to Amazon photos for £1.49 a month. It takes all night to back up my photos.
11pm: Bed.
Total: £79.49
10.15am: After five wake-ups I keep falling back asleep every time B does. I wake up at 10.15, which gives me 45 minutes to sort both of us out before my friend comes round.
11am: I’m stressing and feeling overwhelmed as we both run around cleaning and sterilising some bottles, putting a wash on, getting rid of the dead flowers on the windowsill in the living room, all while we get B ready. I look at my phone and see my friend has messaged to say she’s running late. Sigh.
11.30am: My friend arrives and gives us flowers and a present for B. She stays and we catch up for about an hour and a half. When she leaves A makes us pancakes as we’re starving as we missed breakfast. I have Nutella and raspberries on mine.
2.30pm: We have some stuff to do so we head out. First we go to the post office to post some more paperwork for our remortgage but when we get there there’s nowhere to park so I give up and head to Argos to pick up my nephew’s present. We then go to Sainsbury’s where A picks up an oven tray, whisk, snacks and some stir fry sauce. £13.60
3.30pm: I go into the pharmacy to try and get one of the new over-the-counter contraceptive pills. Postpartum sex isn’t talked about much but I’m feeling physically fine and really up for it so I want to get back on the pill as I don’t want to rely on condoms. I can’t get an appointment with my GP so I figure that OTC is my best option. I get a three-month supply for £19.75 and also pick up some athlete’s foot cream for A for £5.69. Sexy.
7pm: After pottering around for a bit we make some dinner. We have steak, dauphinoise potatoes and corn on the cob. We then watch Inventing Anna but have to pause it 1,000 times as B is really unsettled and seems in pain as she’s arching her back and going really red in the face. We’ve winded her loads but it doesn’t seem to be helping so we try her with some Infacol for the first time. She seems extremely offended at the taste and cries more for a bit but eventually we get some more wind up.
9.30pm: Put B to sleep.
1.15am: B eventually settles to sleep at 1am, I manage to get to sleep at about 1.15am.
Total: £39.04
Food & Drink: £298.22
Entertainment: £0
Home & Health: £32.94
Clothes & Beauty: £0
Transportation: £0
Other: £30.89
Total: £362.05
Conclusion
“This week was quite busy for us and felt almost like a normal pre-pandemic week for me. We wouldn’t usually go for such an expensive meal but as it was for a celebration and A was off work for the week we planned it in advance and budgeted for it. We’ll be being a lot more frugal from this month onward as that’s when my £151 a week Statutory Maternity Pay (SMP) kicks in. I’ll hopefully be going to some baby classes to try and make some mum friends, which is a scary thought in itself! The next big financial hit for us will be nursery, which we’ll need to start paying for in January 2023. It’s well over £1,000 a month full-time. I also want to sort my pension out once I’m back at work by opening a Self-Invested Personal Pensions (and researching how exactly a SIPP works).”
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