I’ve always been drawn to the simplest love songs. Growing up, The Beatles were a nonstop presence in my house, and just as I was learning about shapes and colours in school, I was getting an education in ’60s music at home. The Beatles were masters at the love song, so if you had asked me as a kid what my favourite was, without a doubt I would have replied with one of theirs.
If you asked me in high school, my answer would be something with much more angst. In the mid-to-late 2000’s, the love I wanted was never the love I received, so there were a lot of breakup songs playing in my silver Volkswagen Beetle. You can easily insert any early Dashboard Confessional track here when I was sad, or Bright Eyes’ “First Day of my Life” when I was feeling hopeful.
As an adult, after about a decade of learning what love is as a grown-up through good relationships, bad relationships, and an unfortunate amount of heartbreak, my answer to the love song question has probably changed times more than I could count. It got me thinking about how artists view the love song, and if it changes as time goes on. As we get older, do love songs hold more or less importance? Does the generation we’re born into have anything to do with it? To find out, I reached out to 33 artists and bands, including Aly & AJ, Seratones’ AJ Haynes, CHVRCHES’ Lauren Mayberry, and NIKI, who helped Refinery29 craft the ultimate Spotify playlist for your listening pleasure.
Ahead, see each artist and band’s picks and what makes them ideal love songs.
Responses have been edited and condensed for clarity.
“j’s lullaby (darlin’ i’d wait for you)” by Delaney Bailey; “First Day Of My Life” by Bright Eyes; and “Nothing” by Bruno Major
McKenna Grace:
There’s something special about a love song that can make you cry. I feel like that makes the words that much more meaningful. I love love songs that make me dance and laugh but I especially love love songs that really make me feel. When I sit and listen to the lyrics, I can really hear the love whoever wrote the song had for the muse of the song. These [songs] stand out to me.
Gen Z is a big music loving generation. With the way streaming platforms have made listening to music so easy, most people listen to music all the time. I feel like love songs are especially important because whether you’re writing them, playing them for someone you love or even just feeling lonely to them they can really provoke strong emotions in a way most other songs can’t. I love love songs and I love the way love songs make me feel. They remind me that there is a lot of love in the world.Photo: courtesy of Gus Black.
“Poison & Wine” by The Civil Wars
NIKI:
It’s a sadder, more poignant song, but I think it is pure lyrical ingenuity and perfection. The phrases are short, simple, but jam-packed with so much substance, eloquence and depth all at once. It is a song that makes more and more sense the older I get and the deeper I love. Over time, my definition of love has been obliterated, morphed, expanded and deepened time and time again. “Poison & Wine” is the most comprehensive love song I know, because it covers every ground! Good and bad, ugly and sweet, passion and apathy, wants and needs. Like, “I don’t love you, but I always will” or “The less I give the more I get back” or “I don’t have a choice, but I still choose you.” I mean, come on!!! That’s my kind of love song.
To me, a good love song is one that doesn’t shy away from letting it be the messy and dimensional beast that it is. It’s complicated! It’s much easier to just close yourself off because there is no love without the threat of loss, yes. But if I’ve learned anything, it’s that love is everything. I’m down to risk it all for it. Love begets love. The more you love and open yourself up to it, the more you understand it, the more it deepens, the more instilled perceptions of it change, and funnily enough, the more you get some of it back. Love is it.
“I Feel Love” by Donna Summer
AJ Haynes, frontwoman of Seratones:
For me, this song embodies the devotional bliss possible in love. I believe that in love there is enlightenment. And in that enlightenment, we are able to transform ourselves and shape the world, to love,to quote bell hooks, – “as a practice of freedom.” I used to think that to be loved, I needed to do–to prove my love in material ways — for it to be “real.” While I still believe that right effort is part of my journey, I am also learning that perhaps we just get to be loved as effortlessly as Donna Summer’s voice floats along, free.
A love song is a song that makes me feel loved and contributes to my wellness.
“Make The Most” by Lonr. ft. H.E.R.
Parisalexa:
I think every person wants to hear their partner express how they feel the way Lonr. does in his verse. I also love the beautiful chords and the tone of their voices together.
Love songs are kind of a lost art because people are not as willing to be so naked and vulnerable with their feelings. Because of the internet, emotions can feel computed or filtered and I think a lot of people are afraid to be in love today, so writing a really good love song is brave!
“Invisible String” by Taylor Swift
Lauren Mayberry, frontwoman of CHVRCHES:
I normally favour “love” songs that are all about yearning, pining, and sadness, so I was very happy when folklore came out so I could add this song to the repertoire. I love the imagery on the song — the colours, the vivid description of memories — and I do agree with the idea that all your experience and all your choices led you to where you are now, so for better or worse, you can’t regret anything that has happened. But of course the lyrics are much more profound than that because it’s Taylor.
“Maps” by Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Lauren Mayberry:
This song always feels so honest and fragile, and that’s what love can be a lot of the time. It’s deceptively hard to write a lyric that is so simple but so evocative. The repeated refrain of “Wait, they don’t love you like I love you” over that melody is so heartbreaking and romantic at the same time. Karen O forever and ever.
I sometimes wonder if my friends and I are more inclined to enjoy heartbreak songs than love songs, but maybe we can count them all under the same umbrella? Two sides of the same coin that you need at different points in your life.Photo: courtesy of Sebastian Mlynarski and Kevin J Thomson.
“Downtown” by Majical Cloudz
Laura Jane Grace, solo artist and frontwoman of Against Me!:
It’s the perfect combination of feeling, melody and lyric, and it’s all about simplicity. Love is complicated but also it’s not complicated at all. There’s not a lot going on in the track – some synth, a basic drum loop, some phase sweeps and a vocal, but the production creates the space for the emotion to exist and translate. It’s an auditory description of the perfect moment of love blooming. Lyrically there’s nothing cynical or self-deprecating. This song is honest and direct and completely vulnerable but there’s no cheese. The song is a tribute, not a glorification. It’s perfect.
Everyone’s generation thinks they’re doing something totally new and it’s untrue. All songs are either about love, sex, war or death. Every generation’s love songs are totally valid. The best love songs are the ones that transcend generation, time and place. They aren’t calculated — they’re just pure heart, and that’s forever.Photo: courtesy of Chris Bauer.
“You Are My Love” by Arthur Russell
Indigo de Souza:
This song just really hits me. It feels like he is singing about the truest love there is — a love that is completely unconditional and without bounds.Photo: courtesy of Charlie Boss.
“Our House” by Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young
Emily Kinney:
My mom and dad referenced this song often when I was little. It is one of their favourite songs, and I can remember my mom singing along to the “Our House…” part. I think it was a song that was special to them and their relationship.
A friend of mine once told me he knew he had to marry his wife, because instead of the relationship making his life harder as past ones had, his relationship with his now-wife was making his life easier. I’ve had my share of chasing chaotic, flashy, co-dependent-type love affairs that are the basis for many love songs — including my own — but this song really describes the kind of love I really aspire to have in my life now. “Now everything is easy, ’cause of you.”
Love songs and love stories are pretty much the driving force in so many of my favourite works of art. I think everyone craves feeling heard and understood, and when you find a love song that feels like your own love story or when you recognise yourself in that song, it means the world. Photo: courtesy of Storm Santos.
“My Best Friend” by Tim McGraw and “By Your Side” by Sade
Brittney Spencer:
They’re songs about finding love and companionship in friendship. Friendship is such a grounding and foundational necessity in a relationship. It adds fuel to the high moments and shines a little light in the darker ones.
Life can complicate love sometimes, as I’m sure every generation eventually learns, but I think remembering the simple beauty in walking through it with your person goes a really long way. These songs reflect that sentiment. Photo: courtesy of Nicki Fletcher.
“Get Over Here” by Aly & AJ
Aly & AJ:
It’s the ultimate hookup song for all the lovers out there waiting for their crush to come over.
“I Need My Girl” by The National
Aly & AJ:
It’s just so honest and full of yearning. The song happens to ride that fine line between simple and complicated production.
Falling in love is so incredibly universal, and yet so extremely personal. There’s nothing better than the “falling part” — we all want to go back to that moment, 1,000 times over.Photo: courtesy of Shervin Lainez.
“Bring It On Home to Me” by Sam Cooke
Natalie Hemby:
“Bring It On Home to Me” by Sam Cooke has to be one of the greatest love songs ever written. The recording, the voice, the melodies and arrangements are timeless.
I’m so blessed because I grew up in the era of Boys II Men, Babyface, Sade and Brian McKnight. Love songs were all over the radio. I love them because they remind you of that feeling of being in love — what’s it’s like to be alone, slow dance, kiss — all of it.Photo: courtesy of Alysse Gafjken.
‘This Is For The Lover In You” by Shalamar; “Angel” by Anita Baker
DJ Lindsey:
I really like a love song that has tons of emotion. I think that’s the best way to express love and loss; it’s one of those instances when those emotions come out of us the strongest. So when the artist is giving me that pain or that joy that I can connect to my own experiences with love, that really resonates with me. It also has got to be a time-tested classic. Then, of course, it needs to be a jam too.
My generation did love songs to the extreme. I think that’s indicative of some changes in the time from the ‘90s til now; fewer artists come through the church now, so emotional gospel-influenced singing isn’t as popular. Production budgets are smaller so live instrumentation doesn’t exist as much in music anymore, there are fewer groups doing these layers of harmony. Of course the way we find love has also changed; somebody used to have to call your landline and talk to your mama first before they could reach you. They had to come correct! All of those things give you a certain sound that just isn’t the trend right now. So, our generation had these mega ballads that were the playbook for how to appeal to each other in these situations.Photo: courtesy of Shaniqwa Jarvis.
“Oh Darling” by The Beatles
UPSAHL:
It’s literally begging somebody to stay in your life, and I don’t think love gets any more vulnerable than that. My generation has too much pride to write a song as unapologetically desperate as that.
I think songs have always been a way of saying things that you’re too scared to say to other people. Sometimes if you can just send somebody a song, it says more about how you feel than what you can put into words. Photo: courtesy of Aubree Estrella
“Rayando El Sol” by Maná
Carmen DeLeon:
I love the sentiment and the instruments of this track.
I think a lot of people don’t believe in true love anymore. Love songs are the sentiments and emotions that come from a real experience and that gives people more faith that true love does exist.
“Baby” by Donnie & Joe Emerson
Wet Leg:
It’s so pure and simplistic. I think any love song that mentions holding hands in the lyrics is a winner for me. It’s such an innocent and sweet thing that people do when they are in love.Photo: courtesy of Hollie Fernando.
“Drinkin’ Thing” by Gary Stewart
Lola Kirke:
Because love’s hard and drinking’s easy. Also Gary Stewart’s voice sounds like a heart being ripped open in the best way.
I think the definition of love has expanded tremendously for my generation. In a lot of ways now, all songs are love songs, even if they’re about hate or fun or family or yourself or your dog or politics. Photo: courtesy of Zack Michael.
“Make You Feel My Love” by Bob Dylan and “I Believe (When I Fall in Love It Will Be Forever)” by Stevie Wonder
Danielia Cotton:
These both embody the ideal of lasting, but most importantly, unconditional love — accepting someone exactly as they are, and your willingness to submit to your feelings of love wholeheartedly.
I don’t base my ideas of love on any one person in particular, but rather on bits of good advice from those who seemed to have gotten it right. Unfortunately, I believe my generation was a bit skeptical of the idea of monogamy and fairytale love stories. In life one must listen to their own heart for only they live with the consequences of their choices.
“God Only Knows” by The Beach Boys
Charity Rose Thielen of The Head & The Heart:
There’s a vulnerability and innocence to the vocals and a beautiful simplicity and also spirituality to the lyrics. Musically, the production was creatively inspiring at the time and has remained timeless today, employing feelings of longing and sadness atop a bed of pretty.
Love songs that make you feel something because the writer has tapped into the humanity of longing and love and potential loss will forever resonate with my generation, and every generation both following and proceeding.Photo: courtesy of Jacqueline Justice.
“Cherry” by Amy Winehouse
Luna Li:
I think it’s so brilliant that “Cherry” is a love song about Amy’s guitar. I had so many moments growing up where I felt like music was really the only thing that was truly always there for me, something I could always turn to no matter what, and it’s cool to see those feelings reflected so perfectly in a song.
A song doesn’t have to be about a romantic relationship to be a love song. I think people of my generation can recognise that other types of love, like friendship and self love, are just as important and should be honoured too.
“I Get Along Without You Very Well (Except Sometimes)” as sung by Chet Baker
illuminati hotties:
This song is an ideal love song because it encapsulates love, loss, and longing so simply, so abundantly, and so full of charm when sung by Chet Baker. He is adamant in his independence… except sometimes.
Love songs feel like a timeless staple across all generations. They don’t all have to be fully heartache-y or fully happy — they can just be an expression of pure admiration. And as long as we have humanity, we will have space in our hearts for each other. Photo: courtesy of Lissyelle Laricchia.
“Love” by John Lennon
Noël Wells:
It’s the perfect, timeless love song. Short, sweet, to the point, it manages to transport you to a feeling of eternal love, like remembering something you’ve forgotten. It’s great to listen to when you’re actually in love and will have you nodding your head, but if you’re brokenhearted, it’s also melancholic enough to get you bawling your eyes out and ready to open your heart again.
From my POV, Gen Z does great love songs. They’re plucky and not afraid of their feelings, with love songs about friends and lovers alike. But my generation of millennials don’t feel as open hearted and devoted to each other and I don’t hear songs about these higher loving ideals… My generation’s focus on love is a lot of heartbreak, axes to grind, clapping back, and longing for love. Maybe it’s a thirsty generation. Our love wells are empty and we’re looking for the oasis. But I have no doubt we’ll get there.Photo: courtesy of Nora Zehetner.
“Thinking of You” by Sister Sledge
girl in red:
This song was the soundtrack to my summer romance (that is now my relationship.) The ideal love song is the one that brings back memories from falling in love.
I think love songs are timeless, and I think they mean just as much as they did before.Photo: courtesy of Jonathan Kise.
“I’ll Come Too” by James Blake
Crystal Murray:
It’s the perfect romantic story, about when you’re so in love you could follow somebody anywhere. The way the production glows in your ear and brings you to this state of forgetting where you are —James Blake has this sensibility that can reach your heart. It’s crazy. Love is such a hard subject for everyone. Positive or negative we all have our stories. I remember how the first time I felt like I was in love, I was also in rage of losing the freedom of my emotion —at first, that’s how I looked at it. Love songs always help with dealing with emotions.
“Kaathalae Kaathalae” by Govind Vasantha and Chinmayi (from the film ‘96)
Srisha:
I love how sounds of nature are linked to the concept of love — a whale’s call, birds singing — it almost feels like you’re simultaneously submerged in the ocean and also flying through the skies. The lyrics tell how love is the greatest companion, and the film ’96 follows the story of two long lost lovers who finally meet again, but aren’t destined to be together.
I think our generation is more open to self-love and love for our environment, earth and universe compared to the generations before us. Love is so multi-dimensional. It can describe romantic feelings but also something as simple as practising mindfulness with oneself. I love that our generation’s love songs reflect these values.
“Crying in Public” by Chairlift
Hatchie:
I don’t feel there is a definitive way to describe being in love, it’s a feeling that can be reflected with sounds more than words, but the imagery in these lyrics is beautiful. Being in love comes with every emotion under the sun. “Like the peach you split open with two thumbs, I’m the half without a stone, and my heart is a hollow with a space for your own, or whatever you want to do with it” gets me every time.
I think by this point it can feel like surely every facet of love has already been covered, but it’s such a limitless world that there is always something new to write about it. Everyone can relate to some element of it.
Photo: courtesy of Lissyelle Laricchia.
“Can’t Help Falling In Love” by Elvis Presley
Dorothy Martin, frontwoman of Dorothy:
This is a perfect love song because Elvis’ voice is so vulnerable, tender and endearing that it tugs on the heartstrings. The lyrics feel genuine and they hit home because they’re not generic. This is the perfect song to send someone to communicate your feelings when you can’t seem to find the words. Everything about this song is disarming, tender, and practically screams wedding vows.
“(Everything I do) I Do It For You” by Bryan Adams
Dorothy Martin:
I love a good rock n’ roll love song, and this one is the perfect mixture of edgy and heartfelt. Bryan Adams’ raspy voice bares his soul in the most perfect way while he professes undying love. The lyrics are everything I could dream about reading in a love letter from that special someone. If it doesn’t make you cry tears of joy, it’s not real love.
When I think about my generation and love songs, I think of songs that stir up the emotion and energy of love. If it’s a song you can send to someone else and make them melt, or get them to put down their device and (in the words of Bryan Adams) “look into my eyes,” then it qualifies. This generation could use some good old fashioned romance.Photo: courtesy of Courtney Dellafiora.
“TREEHUGGAZ” and “Nourishment” by Mother Nature
Mother Nature:
“TREEHUGGAZ” and “Nourishment” are ideal love songs because they both focus on self love as the initial love we must cultivate before we are able to properly transmit this energy to others. These songs also give us an insight on how nature acts as our perfect example. Be like nature and give to Self in order to give to others.
Love songs represent the highest frequency. When we feel vulnerable inside, hearing our favorite love song increases our vibration, allowing us to reminisce on a memory, remember a loved one or simply exist in a state of peace. Love songs are necessary reminders of a greater energy.
“The Chair” by George Strait
Hannah Dasher:
To me, “The Chair” is an ideal love song because it’s relevant to any stage you’re in: new couples, old couples, those that wanna be couples. “The Chair” is timeless because it’ll always be cool.
There’s definitely more twerk songs in my generation than love songs. Sure, we can all twerk; but if I’m playing love songs, I’m two-steppin’ in my living room.
“Linger” by The Cranberries
Harmony Tividad of Girlpool:
I think the melodies are unbelievable, and I love the fact that the song touches on the simplicity of how the slightest touch can make someone feel completely crazy if the right person is doing it.
Total devotion is what I love most in love songs — [something] unapologetic and unyielding. Pure infatuation is so often overlooked as a negative thing, when it’s actually beautiful how as humans we can become so dedicated to and enticed by something we don’t even fully understand. We can stay naive in love and it’s genuinely so tender.
“Keep On Loving You” by Cigarettes After Sex
Avery Tucker of Girlpool:
This song feels like it emphasises unconditional love. It also makes you feel how it feels when love/obsession completely takes over you.
Love songs have the ability to transport you to the feeling of love. I think that’s a common thread all generations have. Photo: courtesy of Alexis Gross.
“And I Love Her” by The Beatles
Noga Erez:
In its simplicity, this song summarises everything about the first innocent stages of being in love — you give someone all of you, you are certain that everyone else sees what you see in that person, you are sure that feeling can never fade.
Love is love. The world and its settings may change, but I like to think that our generation experiences the same thing that people felt thousands of years ago.Photo: courtesy of Tal Abudi.
“You Send Me” as sung by Aretha Franklin
Margaret Glaspy:
The performance, the arrangement, and the recording feel like love itself. It’s so exciting and full of life with twists and turns. Aretha could sing the phone book and I would be interested, so to have her singing these lyrics written by Sam Cooke with that band is the recipe for an insanely ideal love song.
Love is timeless, so I suppose I delight in knowing that love songs are something that all generations of people enjoy. While the musical trends change, songs of love and loss will always be ever present and relevant for everyone. Photo: courtesy of Josh Goleman.
“Romeo and Juliet” by Dire Straits
Anaïs Mitchell:
It’s obviously not a “happily ever after” love song, but this one went deep in my heart as a kid and has stayed lodged there all these years. The passion, the humour, the way [Mark] Knopfler ties Shakespeare to his modern life — it’s an epic, cosmic love song that will never get old.
I think almost all songs are love songs, sometimes underneath layers and layers of other feelings and imagery. I’m not sure this changes from generation to generation. As the song goes, “the fundamental things apply as time goes by.”Photo: courtesy of Jay Sansone.
“God Only Knows” by The Beach Boys
Tomberlin:
I think there are many different kinds of great love songs. Sometimes they are a bit devastating. “God Only Knows” is a good example: [It’s about] showing your cards, your fears, but all the while saying you mean something to me even if it fell apart.
It is always inspiring to hear a song that feels like it has been around forever. As a songwriter, I am always hoping something comes out sounding classic but new. Love songs are inspiring; it is always wild to listen to someone describe a feeling or situation you thought was just particular to you. Love songs you can live in are the best.Photo: courtesy of Ebru Yildiz.
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