This week: “I’m a 23-year-old working almost full-time in a pub. I made the switch to hospitality after I burned out from my nine-to-five. I hated the isolation that came from working from home. Having a customer-facing role largely suits me but it can be exhausting, especially the social aspect of going out after work. I burned through a lot of money going out when I first started because I felt like I was making up for lost time in lockdown. I’m now realising I need to slow down a bit, for my mental and financial health.”
Occupation: Bartender
Industry: Hospitality
Age: 23
Location: London
Salary: On average probably £14,400 (this works out at around £250-£350 a week depending on the time of year).
Paycheque amount: £250-£350 weekly.
Number of housemates: Two
Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses
Housing costs: £570 rent.
Loan payments: £0
Savings? Nope.
Pension? No.
Utilities: I transfer my housemate, E, £98 a month for council tax, water, Wi-Fi and gas and electric. I have no idea what the breakdown of this works out as.
All other monthly payments: My mum pays my phone bill because when I pay it myself I choose the cheapest option and never have enough data or minutes to contact her. £24.99 gym membership, £4 London Renters Union. Subscriptions: £3.50 Substack.
Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Yes, I did an undergraduate degree which was covered by tuition fee loans, maintenance loans and various part-time jobs.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money?
I don’t remember having many conversations about money. It probably would have been useful!
If you have, when did you move out of your parents’/guardians’ house?
For university at 18. I never really moved back.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself? Does anyone else cover any aspects of your financial life?
I am largely independent of my family (apart from that phone bill) but very dependent on my generous friends and boyfriend.
What was your first job and why did you get it?
I started doing hospitality work for an agency at 18 to have some extra cash around Christmastime.
Do you worry about money now?
Yes. I live in my overdraft and have recently discovered Monzo Flex.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income?
No.
7.30am: Ow. Wake up with a very, very sore head. For some reason I am drawn to Rowan Atkinson in my hungover state so I start watching Man vs. Bee on Netflix.
9.30am: Make a poor attempt at getting up and having some breakfast. My boyfriend, J, has bought horrible, inedible protein yoghurts so I am forced to order a McDonald’s breakfast for myself and my flatmate, £11.96.
10.30am: McDonald’s breakfast arrives! Buzzed off my flat white, I attempt a Guardian crossword but quickly give up and go back to Man vs. Bee, which is more my speed.
2.30pm: I get out of bed and make some ramen with all the veg I can find.
3pm: J calls and I catch him up on Man vs. Bee. He tells me about work stuff I don’t understand. Something to do with computers?
4pm: Get to work. It’s very quiet so I just sit down and polish some cutlery.
8.30pm: Leave work early as it’s dead. I go to Tesco to get some treats for J as he’s not feeling well but when I get to the checkout I realise I’ve forgotten my wallet. My phone is too messed up to have Apple Pay so I have to abandon the treats and treat him to my company instead.
9pm: Have an oven pizza and watch some TV before we go to bed.
Total: £11.96
9am: Wake up and walk J to work. He kindly buys me breakfast of a flat white and a yoghurt bowl from the nice cafe next to his work. I sit there for an hour or so doing admin-y tasks on my laptop, then go to post some Vinted parcels.
12pm: Get home and order some contact lenses as my glasses are getting repaired and I need something in the meantime. Contacts are really expensive for me as I have an astigmatism so I usually just wear glasses, £31.
3pm: Our letting agency calls to tell us they’ll be doing a flat inspection when they come to look at our plumbing situation. We have a collective panic attack as the flat is in a state of significant disarray.
5pm: Have an interview for some part-time work but realise in the interview that I prepared the wrong thing for the task-based part. Feel a bit disheartened but there are other jobs. I spend the next few hours tidying for the inspection.
6pm: Have some ramen as an early dinner.
7pm: Get ready to head out for a pub quiz with my flatmates and some other friends. This is the first time we’ve done it with a six-person team so we’re confident we’ll place. Buy a can of Beavertown on the way to break a note, £2.90.
9pm: We do not place. I paid £12 for us to play, then £9.60 on a pint and a lemonade for one of my friends. Other people also buy me various pints.
10.15pm: For some reason I UberXL us home, £15.35. I really should do a more local pub quiz.
11pm: At home the night descends a bit. A big box of Stellas materialises and also a bag of mystery supplies that my flatmate found on the floor of her workplace. A lot of silliness ensues.
1am: Must have gone to bed at some point.
Total: £70.85
9am: Wake up with J who is very hungover and being a big baby about it. He didn’t even have any of the mystery bag! I make us coffee and he goes to work.
9.35am: The letting agency texts to say the inspection will be between 10am and 12pm rather than 11am and 3pm as agreed. Do a frantic last-minute tidy, mostly of empty cans of Stella.
11.30am: Estate agent comes round, does an inspection and says the plumber will be round later today. Phew.
12.30pm: Eat some cottage cheese on toast with lemon juice and freshly cracked black pepper, which is the only good way to eat it.
2pm: It’s my turn to plan date night so I make a reservation at a nice restaurant and book cinema tickets, £10.60.
3pm: My manager is late for work, which gives me time to get a flat white and an Aero, £3.90.
8pm: Eat a questionable staff meal when I go on break. They can be very hit and miss depending on the chef’s mood.
10pm: I order more food for when I finish as I realise I haven’t eaten much and am now starving. I have my staff drink and sit with a few of my co-workers who have come in on their night off. The staff drink is free, the food is £4.25. I put it on a tab to come out of my wages so I don’t have to pay for it now.
10.30pm: Another drink, then start walking home with the co-worker who lives nearest me. We get absolutely drenched in the rain then pop into the bar where my housemate E works. My co-worker buys my pint. E informs me that the plumber never came. Love estate agents.
12am: Bedtime. I drink a bottle of water and have a melatonin because I can’t face another hangover.
Total: £14.50
9am: Wake up and lie in bed for as long as possible before I have to leave for a hair appointment.
10am: Finally leave without having had breakfast or coffee, which is one of my stupidest and most expensive habits. Get a flat white for £2.50 and some weird off-licence pastries, which are somehow £2.99.
2.30pm: Three hours and two coffees later, my hair is done! It was done by a trainee so it was only £80 for a cut and a half-head of highlights. I paid £30 as a deposit last week so I have £50 left to pay. I tip £10.
3pm: On the walk home I buy a mini stick of cheddar from M&S to grate into my soup, which is £1.05. I spend £6.86 in Savers on mini beauty blenders, shaving foam, plasters, hair bands and an eyeshadow brush. I am very hungry but manage to resist the pull of a jerk chicken bagel.
4pm: Start getting ready for date night. Realise that I don’t have enough in my account to pay for dinner and it’s meant to be my treat. Frantically lie to Monzo and tell them I earn £22,000 a year. They stupidly believe me and up my credit limit. Phew.
6pm: Meet J for an early dinner. We have a carafe of wine, a couple of starters and some sharing plates. He insists on splitting even though I’ve said it’s my treat, which is probably just as well. £56.81 for my half.
8.25pm: Get to the cinema. I get popcorn and my boyfriend gets a blueberry muffin (which is something that should never be eaten outside of breakfast hours and especially not at a cinema), £5.15.
11pm: The movie was great! I feel happy that I planned such a successful date night. J calls an Uber as I’ve worn silly shoes and my feet hurt.
Total: £135.56
9am: Wake up with J and laze in bed while he rushes around getting ready for work. He lives at home but his parents are away so we have the place to ourselves, which is nice.
10am: Eventually rouse myself for a coffee. I have it in the bath while reading my book, which feels like the ultimate luxury.
10.30am: Have toast with peanut butter and reply to a few emails about part-time jobs I’ve applied to. Decide toast is not enough so I supplement with Greek yoghurt, honey, berries and seeds. While checking my emails, I get an eBay alert that a pair of shoes I want have been listed in my exact half-size. They’re £85.14 but usually sell for up to £250 so I go for it. I’ve made around £150 selling on Depop and Vinted this month, so this feels justified.
12.30pm: Head home to get ready for work and pack up a Vinted parcel I need to post today.
1pm: Go for a walk with my flatmate. It’s nice and quiet out as it’s a weekday afternoon. This time I do not resist the call of the jerk chicken bagel, £3.60. I eat my flatmate’s unwanted half of hers, too. She is both impressed and disgusted.
3pm: Work. My shift puts me in a bad mood and my staff food is verging on inedible. I practically run to J’s house after. I don’t even bother with a shift drink.
10.30pm: J orders us a takeaway and we watch TV while I soak my feet, which always hurt from work. Feel a bit depressed and don’t even make it to the end of the episode. I have a headache and I’m worried I won’t sleep so I take some paracetamol and a herbal sleeping aid.
Total: £88.74
11am: Wake up really late. Have plans with a friend but she cancels, phew. J goes out to get us coffees while I snooze.
12pm: We have coffees in bed and ease ourselves into the day. Breakfast of toast and leftovers. It’s a peaceful, coexisting kind of day.
4pm: TfL payment of £1.65 for a bus comes out as I forgot to top up my Oyster and had to tap in yesterday.
5pm: Eat a slightly weird dinner of avocado on toast and mackerel. I don’t normally eat toast for every meal but J’s family buy really nice bread.
6pm: Arrive at work for an uneventful shift.
11.30pm: My flatmates E and C come in to entertain me as it’s really quiet at work. I have a few drinks while closing, then head to another bar with them and two of my co-workers/friends. I don’t pay for drinks at work and my co-worker buys a round at the second bar. We have the life-changing realisation that we can drink for free at our flat so head back there with my co-workers.
2am: Bag. Why is there always bag? I’ll transfer my flatmate for this at some point.
Total: £1.65
8am: Not sure why my body woke me up at this time. I pack a suitcase full of laundry to take to my boyfriend’s as our washing machine is still broken because the plumber didn’t come. As I’m packing I find a pill at the bottom of my makeup bag. It’s covered in silvery highlighter but I can tell it used to be blue and has the number 10 on it, which means it’s a Valium. Praise be! I take it and wrap up to trek to J’s in the rain.
9.30am: Sit in a café and get a coffee while I call J to make sure he is actually awake. Pay £3.40 for a below-average flat white.
9.50am: J calls again once I’ve left the café to ask me to get him one too. I’m drenched and grumpy but comply, £2.90.
10am: He’s still in bed so I join him for a bit then go have a shower and make us some toast. I’ve eaten all the good bread so we’re slumming it with Hovis, ugh.
1.30pm: I leave for work, buying some hair clips on the way to give some volume to my hair, which has been flattened by the rain, £1.
3pm: I snack on chocolate and crisps all day, provided by work. I need a fruit or vegetable very badly.
8pm: Have my shift meal, which does feature some vegetables but they’re fried in butter and cheese so not sure if that counts. It definitely doesn’t feel healthy.
11pm: Make it to the end of the shift somehow. The Valium was probably a mistake. I am as close to sleep as you can be while technically having your eyes open. Psych myself up for the bus ride to my J’s but he says to get an Uber and split it with him so I don’t have to travel alone in the dark. For some reason the split fare doesn’t work so I just pay the full £8.99.
11.30pm: E rings about our very stressful plumbing situation, which has worsened somehow: water is leaking into the flat below so we can’t use the shower or bath at all. Offer to come back but end up staying at J’s as there’s not much we can do now. An exciting problem for tomorrow!
Total: £16.29
Food & Drink: £106.76
Entertainment: £10.60
Clothes & Beauty: £153
Home & Health: £31
Travel: £25.99
Other: £12
Total: £339.35
Conclusion
“It’s not a surprise to me that I live so far beyond my means. Obviously getting my hair done and buying new shoes are expenses that only happen once a year or so, they just happened to fall in the same week. My main takeaway is that I need to stop frittering away money on coffees, and to find cheaper restaurants for date nights (and that I should party less, but I knew that already). Since writing the diary, Monzo tells me I’m spending 47% less than last month so…progress!”
Ed note: Money Diaries are meant to reflect an individual’s experience and do not necessarily reflect Refinery29’s point of view. Refinery29 in no way encourages illegal activity or harmful behaviour.
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