Content Warning: This diary contains a reference to disordered eating.
This week: “I’m a 26-year-old trainee clinical psychologist living in London. I previously wrote a diary two and a half years ago just after starting the course, and soon I will be qualifying. I moved to London for my course and I now plan to stay, apart from leaving to go travelling for three months when I qualify. I currently live with housemates but will probably move out after travelling. I haven’t finalised the details of this yet. In my previous diary my serious boyfriend at the time dumped me (lol). Since then, I have had a series of “situationships” — the joys of London dating — but I’m seeing someone at the moment and so far, so good (though it’s very early days!). I worry about being single because it makes it virtually impossible to buy property here, but I don’t worry about it too much because I have a great housing situation and like the flexibility of being able to travel when I want without a mortgage to pay. I have previously experienced a lot of anxiety and guilt around spending, and resent spending money on things I deem unnecessary — it can bizarrely make me feel very greedy. However, I think I’m managing that better now, and feel more comfortable treating myself and the people around me, though it can panic me sometimes when I’m stressed in general. I have saved a lot of money over the last three years, mainly thanks to my very reasonable housing situation, and also generally having quite low-cost taste and only buying second hand clothes!”
Occupation: Trainee clinical psychologist
Industry: Healthcare (NHS)
Age: 26
Location: London
Salary: £39,217.50 (mid point of Band 6 NHS salary plus weighting due to location)
Paycheque Amount: £2,300 (depending on expenses)
Number of housemates: 2, J and B
Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses
Housing costs: £528 for a tiny rented room.
Loan payments: About £90 student loan. I’ve never checked the total because it’s too sad.
Pension?: I pay 9.8% (about £320 per month). I think the NHS pays 20.6% — I never look at my pension because it confuses me but this seems nice of them.
Savings?: I have around £60,000 split across various accounts. I moved all my money around into good interest rate accounts after advice on my last diary! I have saved a lot the last two and a half years by having cheap rent and a tiny room, allowing me to save to travel when I qualify, which I will probably spend up to £20,000 on. The rest I hope will eventually go towards a wildly optimistic plan for a deposit some day.
Utilities: My share of the bills is approximately £40 energy, £8 wifi, £45 council tax and £12 water. However, we rent out our parking spaces, and when this is split we earn about £60 each, which I think of as balancing out a lot of these bills.
All other monthly payments: £5 donation to BEAT; £10 phone contract; £21.60 student gym membership (which I will no longer qualify for soon!). Subscriptions: £3.66 for my share of house Netflix account; £7.99 Disney+.
Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
I did an undergraduate degree in psychology, which included a placement year. I received the minimum student maintenance loan and tuition loan throughout my degree and my parents gave me £50 per week to live off, which I topped up with savings by working full time during the holidays.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money?
We didn’t really discuss money and I never worried about it (super lucky). My parents set up accounts for us and I was (and still am) a bit clueless. Although we were financially comfortable, I’d say my parents are very sensible financially and have instilled somewhat of a fear of spending in me. We’re definitely ‘supermarket own brands’ vibe and spending lots of money was viewed negatively.
If you have, when did you move out of your parents’/guardians’ house?
I moved out to go to uni aged 19 but moved back in for university holidays and on my placement year. I then lived at home for seven months after graduating during COVID-19 and moved in briefly between housing contracts just before starting my course two and half years ago.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself? Does anyone else cover any aspects of your financial life?
I would say when I first moved to London two and a half years ago. I was 90% financially responsible for eight months prior, but my dad helped me with sorting car insurance/MOT and would occasionally fill up my car with petrol. Although I wasn’t dependent on him for this it was very kind. Now I’m still on the family Spotify plan, but other than that, no one covers any of my finances.
What was your first job and why did you get it?
I worked as a chambermaid for a family friend — all about those connections and short working hours, which were ideal.
Do you worry about money now?
I don’t worry about not having enough money as I’m in the fortunate position of having savings and good prospects when I qualify (super lucky position to be in). I doubt I’ll ever be able to buy property in London on my own, but that doesn’t worry me as such. I have a lot of guilt around spending, though this is improving, so most of my money worries day to day are feeling I’ve spent too much which can makes me feel guilty. For example, I spent £700 on laser hair removal 18 months ago and had a few sleepless nights even though I knew I could afford it, because I just felt guilty for having spent so much. So I have anxiety around money and what spending means to me, but not about running out of money as such. That would definitely change if I lost my job, or if my housing situation significantly changed.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income?
I got £2,000 when my grandmother passed away when I was 21. My parents are planning to give some money to my sibling when they get married soon and have said they will match this contribution (when I turn 30 as marriage is looking unlikely, lol) but I don’t know what this will be. Similarly, when my sibling was made redundant a year ago my parents gave us both £500 towards rent (I just got a share because of sibling equality which was extremely generous and unnecessary). They set up savings account for us both when we were very young which they paid into and paid any birthday/Christmas money I received into. I’m unsure how much this amounted to, but I’d estimate £6,000 total, which I assume was a majority of their contributions.
6:30 a.m. — Wake up and spend two minutes contemplating whether having a job is worth it. Make myself a cup of tea with oat milk and some Weetabix (Lidl’s version though) with soya milk, take my six morning vitamins and antidepressant, and say hi to my housemate J who is up and about to cycle to work.
7:37 a.m. — Run for the train and make it, armed with toothbrush, toothpaste, mouthwash and tongue scraper as my housemate B was in the shower until seconds before I needed to leave. Do today’s Wordle and share my score with my housemate and the guy I’m dating (J and D, respectively), then realise that’s probably an ick. Lol. My train is expensed.
8:10 a.m. — Walk from the station done and I’m at work. I’m on placement in a hospital working with people who have experienced brain injuries, and I am loving it. I collect my scrubs (the dream, they’re like pyjamas), get changed and then head to a meeting.
4:30 p.m. — Back-to-back sessions and meetings for the afternoon done with only a disappointing cup of tea and sad little flapjack to get me through. My other placements have been much more one-on-one therapy heavy, which I enjoy, but I love the mix on this placement, especially working with different disciplines and people’s families, which I find so interesting! Even though I’m technically finished, I realise I haven’t written a note from a joint session. I log in to write it and discover my colleague has done it — truly the best feeling. After a chat with colleagues, I get changed and then head to the station. I’m taking a rest day from exercise today and meeting a friend for dinner.
5:37 p.m. — I head to the pub to meet my friend L and we end up getting two half pints each of an IPA we haven’t tried before as we were too worried we wouldn’t like it to initially commit to a full pint. I’m embarrassingly slightly tipsy, £7.30.
7 p.m. — Head to the restaurant a couple of doors down. We share bhel poori, masala dosa, chana masala, dal, mixed vegetable curry, a big poori and I order an emergency paratha halfway through because there’s not enough carb for all the curry. The food is all delicious and we catch up about our placements, possible travel plans when we qualify, our dating lives and our theses. I leave the restaurant feeling happy but slightly too full and am relieved to see that D has messaged me and has not in fact ghosted me for sending him my Wordle score. Phew. £22.30 for my half of dinner, plus £3 for the Tube and train home.
10:15 p.m. — In bed, showered, teeth brushed and flossed, faced cleansed (my only skincare, oops). Watch a bit of Modern Family while replying to some messages then put my phone on do not disturb and read How to Kill Your Family.
11:07 p.m. — One final wee and it’s time to sleep.
Total: £32.60
6:35 a.m. — Awake again. This work thing is relentless. Tea, Weetabix and pills secured, I sit back on my bed and watch some more Modern Family and get changed before heading to the station.
7:55 a.m. — Check my account on the train thinking I have about £50 and I have £2.38. So humbled. I use Chase for my everyday purchases because it’s 1% cashback, so I transfer £50 over which should be fine until pay day (spoiler alert: It’s absolutely not).
8:10 a.m. — Arrive at work, scrubs on, make myself a cafetière of coffee before a morning of meetings and patient sessions.
12:30 p.m. — Break for lunch with my team. Today’s lunch is veggie chilli made by my housemate (we each cook one night a week and as I was out last night I’ve used my portion as leftovers for lunch for today and tomorrow). We play some online games as a team (Connections is the best) and chat.
4:30 p.m. — Another day done. I am so hungry and ate all my snacks too early, but I had some really good client sessions so I’m feeling productive. It’s raining torrentially so I run for a bus and make it, thank God.
5 p.m. — Spend the train ride sending D restaurant options as he thinks we should go for small plates and cocktails tomorrow, which sounds extremely bouijee and also great. I manage to find a few options which have a good selection of meat and vegan dishes.
5:30 p.m. — I get home and put on a podcast, My Favourite Murder (I’m very into true crime if that’s not obvious) while I unload the dishwasher, then inhale some chocolate and a bagel thin. I need to work on my thesis but in a bid to avoid it as much of possible I try on clothes from a Vinted parcel I ordered which has been left out in the rain. Cute. I got a pair of Gymshark leggings which match a sports bra I also got on there, and a pale pink Zara body suit as I have it in black and love it. I try to only buy secondhand, however, when I discover the leggings have a much more noticeable hole than advertised and the bodysuit is stained, I hope that making Greta proud is worth it.
6:40 p.m. — Drag myself out for a 2km run, 45-minute spin class, and 2km run home. I can’t think of anything worse but I know I’ll enjoy it and the endorphins will be worth it.
8:40 p.m. — Sit down to watch a documentary about Alexei Navalny with a big bowl of courgette and lemon pasta.
9:40 p.m. — Eaten, washing up done and kitchen surfaces cleaned. I do a bit of work while half watching the documentary with B.
11:40 p.m. — Finally bedtime. I’m not gonna get eight hours of sleep and I’m already sad about it.
Total: £0
6:40 a.m. — Wake up and somehow feel more awake this morning — maybe because it’s Friday? See a notification that £4.99 has left my account for a HelloFresh box — I won a free one but this is for shipping. I’m usually a committed Lidl gal, but since everything is so expensive now I find meal delivery kits are often cheaper when there’s a deal on and help me get out of recipe ruts.
7:35 a.m. — End up leaving late so run the whole way to the station. Arrive and the train is delayed anyway. Classic.
8:05 a.m. — I’m even earlier to work than usual. Scrubs on, coffee made, I check my emails and have big plans to make myself a to-do list before my first meeting but get distracted chatting to colleagues about who will get our pay out if we die in service. Classic Friday chats.
12:30 p.m. — Break for lunch after a busy morning of a meeting, patient sessions and admin. Lunch is leftover chilli again, and the office talk about pets and people show photos of theirs, which is my kind of break.
4:30 p.m. — Busy Friday afternoon complete. I get the nicest feedback from a patient today and I’m still on a high as I run home. Day to day, I forget how much we make a difference (cringe, I’m sorry) so getting a reminder is so nice and helps make the stress of my thesis much more worth it. I pop into Sainsbury’s en route and get two Oatly baristas as they’re reduced and a bottle of tonic water in case I want a pre-date G&T, £4.30.
7 p.m. — Two glasses of wine deep and ready for my date I run to the station armed with a G&T in a coffee cup, £3.30. I struggle to open the cup. It explodes, covering me in G&T and splashing the people around me. I cannot stop laughing at how hilarious and also deeply, deeply embarrassing this is. The poor woman next to me. I can’t stop cringing at myself and the fact I’d smugly sent a photo of my cup to D seconds before the incident. I’d probably hate me if I could see myself, but the two wines have made me inconsolably hysterical as I keep apologising to my seat neighbour who is really chill. A queen.
8 p.m. — Still covered in gin and freezing as a result I arrive at the restaurant. We get white wine, sourdough, “chorizo” croquettes, okra pakora, dumplings, a “sausage’ dish, and sticky toffee pudding, and share everything (all vegan).
10:30 p.m. — Full and still tipsy but now also exhausted (why is staying up past 9 p.m. hard) we split the bill. It comes to £105 but D pays so I transfer him £53. I don’t usually spend this much on dinner but the food is amazing. Our other dates have been much more low key and also I just love food. We debate getting a drink in a pub but decide to head back to mine, £3 for Tube and train.
1 a.m. — I set a firm 1 a.m. bedtime before we even met up because I have a long run in the morning and miraculously we go to sleep on time.
Total: £68.59
8 a.m. — I wake up just before my alarm and to a message from J to say she has left a cup of tea outside my room. What a dream. I drink my tea while D tries to convince me to stay in bed.
8:35 a.m. — Only five minutes late we meet our friend and head out for a 16km run. It’s a lovely day, cold but blue skies, and we do a really nice route along the river at a slow chatty pace.
10 a.m. — Run done, we head home via Little Sainsbury’s for some avocados, £2.20.
10:45 a.m. — Home, showered, avocado mashed, seasoned, and spread on bagels with hot sauce and pickled onions.
12 p.m. — Me and D walk for to get the Tube, £1.95. We part ways en route, and I walk from the Tube station to a restaurant to meet my friend G for lunch. We’ve had this booked for months and are going to an amazing looking veggie small plates restaurant. I swear I don’t usually eat out this much or have so many small plates. We get laffa bread, crudités, hummus, baba ganoush, falafel, smacked cucumbers, savoy cabbage and pickles. This doesn’t sound like a ton of food but there is so, so much and it’s all incredible. They also give us free sparkling water which excites me too much. We split the bill, my half is £35.50 and worth every penny.
3:25 p.m. — After basically running across London I make my train home back to my parents. I am alarmingly hot and sweaty in a jumper and spend the first 20 minutes of the journey trying to subtly survive this horrific hot flush situation. I make the grave error of stalking my ex and see he’s away with his new girlfriend and feel weird. Why do I look at stuff knowing it will make me sad. I put boygenius on and look out of the window in ultimate main character mode before deciding to suck it up and get on with some work.
6 p.m. — Accidentally take the longest, slowest train which I expect I booked to save approximately £5. It was not worth it. Though I got a surprising amount of work done and had a table to myself most of the way.
6:30 p.m. — My parents collect me from the station and we drive home via Lidl so I can pick up some snacks and a Mother’s Day card, £4.79.
7:30 p.m. — After eating I have a long bath and then sit with my parents and watch Women Talking, which I want to love but find a bit boring to be honest. They really are just talking.
10:30 p.m. — Brush my teeth and cleanse my face. My mum has asked me to clear out my childhood bedroom while I’m home which is a very fair request when I moved out nearly three years ago, but also takes a lot of effort. I start sorting some shoes, decide I actually want to keep a couple of pairs and then realise I have to carry everything back on the train. I find a couple of childhood diaries and after reading a page or two it acts as a contraceptive as I was such a little weirdo and wonder how I had any friends.
Total: £44.44
6:45 a.m. — Wake up and spend about 15 minutes worrying about every decision I’ve ever made, my brain’s favourite early morning activity. However, I drift back to sleep without too much effort so that’s good.
8:45 a.m. — Wake up again and head downstairs to have breakfast. It’s forecast to rain heavily all day from 11 a.m. so we agree to get out early for a walk.
9:15 a.m. — My dad drives us to a nearby country park. We get a coffee (oat latte for me) to drink as we walk around, and I am smug I remembered to bring us each a reusable cup. I notice a vegan cake (date and apple shortbread) which my mum insists I need to get, and my dad pays. We walk around for about two hours though it starts to drizzle and we head back to the car where I eat my shortbread.
11:30 a.m. — Drive a short distance to the care home my grandparents are in which is the reason for my trip home. Unfortunately, both grandparents have developed dementia in the last few years and moved into a care home. My grandma has deteriorated and likely only has a couple of weeks to live. I’m really sad about it, but I’m glad to have had enough warning to be able to come home to say bye and spend time with her. I sit with my grandma for half an hour or so on my own talking to her, reminiscing and she holds my hand. She has got a lot more unwell since I last saw her and I find it more upsetting than expected. I have a proper ugly cry silently but she doesn’t notice thankfully. I am usually quite good at controlling my emotions which I expect is because of my job, but I remind myself I’m human and it’s fine to be sad. She’s getting tired so I join my parents and grandad for a game of Uno with some of the other residents and staff. After an hour or so it’s time for their lunch, so I give both grandparents a hug and kiss goodbye (extra long one for grandma) and we head off.
12:45 p.m. — On the drive home we’re all quite sad but discuss making a roast for dinner to cheer everyone up. I decide to make a sticky toffee pudding as I find cooking very therapeutic.
1:45 p.m. — Home and I make myself a weird lunch of a baguette with hot sauce and vegan chicken strips. I then head upstairs and begin sorting out my room. Due to weight fluctuations in my teenage years (ah, disordered eating habits <3), my clothes range from size 6 to 16 and it’s funny seeing it all spread out. I find a leotard from when I did gymnastics, which I stopped aged 11, and discover I still fit into it. I keep it because obviously, you never know when you might need a leotard! This may be why I have accumulated quite so much stuff. D voicenotes me so I listen and reply, then continue sorting my stuff.
3:45 p.m. — I am losing the will to live looking through stuff and know I should be working on my thesis, so I obviously head downstairs to make the sticky toffee pudding. I then also end up making tea for everyone and starting on the roast. I hit new levels of procrastination when I start cleaning the kettle, followed by the dishwasher filter, and then decide to list some clothes on Vinted. I make £3 immediately and decide it was all worth it. Who needs a doctorate anyway?!
6 p.m. — After eating and loading the dishwasher I dish up the sticky toffee pudding and join my parents to watch Can I Tell You A Secret? on Netflix.
10pm: Back upstairs I continue sorting and spend half an hour laughing at an old diary I’d written aged four where one page was dedicated to my love of “chickin nuggets, chips and crisps”. What a vibe.
Total: £0
10:40 a.m. — After a lot of procrastinating this morning I start working. Even though I’m technically on annual leave, my thesis is due soon and I need all the time I can get. For the last few months this has been the same, I took a week of leave in January purely to work on an assignment. I try to ignore my resentment and crack on with some work but end up sorting a lot of stuff in my room as it’s so messy. Afterwards I eventually start work and am shockingly productive in a short space of time.
12:40 p.m. — More food and breaks needed, I have soup with bread and more lentil crisps for lunch. Neither of my parents work on Monday so we agree to go for a walk later.
1:40 p.m. — Head off for a walk. It’s outrageously windy and we stop to get a takeaway coffee (remember to bring the cups again). I decide I’m taking the piss a bit with the freebies so I get these, £10.80.
2:15 p.m. — Home and I continue working. I’m waiting for the wind to drop to go for a run but remember I have an hour-long work call/meeting at 5 p.m. so I’ll have to go soonish. Annoying.
3:15 p.m. — Head out on a run, lol, the number of breaks I’ve taken today.
6 p.m. — Call done and my parents are eating dinner. There’s a spare jacket potato (how?) which I happily take as a starter while cooking some vegan chicken pieces and stir-frying courgette, broccoli and cabbage. There’s a severe lack of flavour and condiments in this house but I make do. Some of the vegan chicken randomly comes with chips so I have to double carb it, what a shame.
7:30 p.m. — Decide to have a bath. I have really regressed into my teenage habits. I probably have a bath every few months in London but here they’re daily. I then join my parents downstairs and we watch Call The Midwife and we eat the last of the sticky toffee pudding. I haven’t told any of my friends I’m back as I wasn’t sure what the vibe would be with my grandma being so unwell, and having my thesis to write. But I’m starting to get cabin fever and look forward to speaking to someone under 60 soon.
9:30 p.m. — Time for more room sorting and I find more hilarious diaries including an agenda I’d written for a sleepover aged eight including two breaks for snacks. Nothing has changed. Speak to D for a bit then head to bed around 11 p.m.
Total: £10.80
8:30 a.m. — Wake up and immediately decide to start looking online at towels to get for my birthday from my parents. I love being young and cool.
9 a.m. — Try to start working but I simply don’t want to. My room is still carnage and I need to have everything packed up to head back to London, so I spend half an hour sorting stuff and labelling which boxes are for the charity shop, fabric bank, et cetera.
10:15 a.m. — Finally time to start work. I need to send some emails to supervisors and realise my expenses are due so do these tasks before trying to analyse my data. Shockingly it goes a lot better than I had anticipated, and I get loads done, okay! Maybe I’ve discovered a secret for thesis success: more breaks than work. Finally having something down on paper is good for my motivation, but after 45 minutes I try to convince my dad to take a break and go for a coffee with me, but apparently others take their working hours more seriously than I am today. I eat a pretzel and continue.
12 p.m. — My mum gets home and I get her to join the campaign to go for a coffee. She convinces my dad that we need to and he agrees as it’s his lunch break. He drives us and then buys us all coffees and gets me a cake (it’s maple and pecan and amazing). I try to pay but he insists (have you noticed how sweet he is? The nicest man, honestly!)
12:45 p.m. — Home and I make myself an avocado sandwich for lunch with lentil chips.
3:30 p.m. — Get the train and it’s largely uneventful until there’s an announcement that the police are getting on as they’re looking for someone on board. I’m invested and start looking around to see if anyone’s looking guilty. Eventually after nothing exciting happens we’re on our way.
4 p.m. — I decide to order some pillows for £22 and then spend the rest of the journey working. I’m shocked to realise I am ahead of the schedule I wrote myself! Finally feel like I’m making progress! Yay.
5:45 p.m. — Finally home. I catch up with J who is in the kitchen and makes me a tea. We chat and then I start cooking a Hello Fresh meal ready for dinner after run club tonight and half to take to work for lunch tomorrow. It’s a refried bean and pepper rice bowl. I plan to unpack my bag but get caught up listening to voicenotes and responding and it’s suddenly nearly time to leave. At some point I eat a slice of toast because carbs = life.
6:45 p.m. — Dressed and ready, me and J head off to our running club, the same one I went to for the first time in my other diary! Now I’ve been going for two and a half years and sometimes lead the runs. Cute!
8:45 p.m. — Heat up my dinner and join J to watch 24 Hours In Police Custody, our fave. We watch an episode while I help her with her Hinge matches and then we have herbal teas and catch up with B when she gets in. The meal is good and we follow it up with a couple of Candy Kittens, elite dessert.
10:15 p.m. — Big plans of reading and getting an early night are out the window as I start replying to messages and don’t turn the light off until 11:15 p.m. I know I’ll regret this when that alarm goes off.
Total: £22
Food & Drink: £139.89
Clothes & Beauty: £0
Home & Health: £22
Entertainment: £0
Travel: £11.25
Other: £4.79
Total: £177.93
Conclusion
“This week was not typical due to going back to my parents’ place, which I usually only do a few times per year. But it reminded me how incredibly generous they are, and made me feel like a teenager for a few days, which was weird. This kept so many of my costs down, which would be different obviously if I’d been in London. Most weeks I spend very little during the week and more at the weekend, and more on travel than I did here. But in general I don’t spend much on clothes and beauty, so it wasn’t that unusual. I spend such a bulk of my money on going out for food which was very obvious here, as it’s the main way I catch up with friends. However, three times a week plus loads of coffees out is way more than I’d usually do, or consider reasonable. I feel a lot more relaxed about money than I used to and I’m very grateful for that. However, if I do want to buy on my own or have children, I think I’d view money very differently, so for now I’m trying to feel less guilt about spending, enjoy myself while saving here and there, and see what happens. Also recording this made me realise how unproductive I was with my thesis this week which I hope is not the norm for me because it’s due in soon!”
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
Money Diary: An Account Manager In Glasgow On £39k